As I sit here waiting for community service this morning, I reached an ah ha moment. With all the wonderful things finally starting to take shape in my life, I couldn't understand why my stress and anxiety peaked over last Fri-Sat 9/6/13-9/7/13. Now I do.
It was 9/7/07 that my children were taken from their home by their father ex-parte under false pretenses which was proven through trial in 2012. Never to return. Yes my family waited 5yrs for justice.
I have surrendered to the thought of never seeing my children again as long as the family courts allow the continuation of abuse by abusive parents and lawyers to continue. I am powerless there.
Where I have become empowered is through the use of social media and the internet where my story, thoughts, feelings, and experiences are posted in hopes some day my children will see I love them ... I miss them... I never gave up on them ... the truth. .. and I tried. This includes my blog, Letters to my daughters, which was born as a direct result of my children's father taking, opening and admittedly refusing to give my children any and all letters, photos, and gifts mailed to my children by anyone associated with me.
I keep the hope of some day and karma. My future with my children rests in faith.
I'm so sorry to hear of your situation. You are not alone, there are many cases in the Plymouth court that are all too similar! I have been living your nightmare for over a year, it's horrible. Keep your head down and keep going..your kids will need you. This will not go on forever. I will never understand how these men of money and power, with no moral compasses end up seemingly " lily white" in society's eyes or that of the courts! Try to keep your emotions in check and not feed into the constant attacks, it makes their case stronger and you lose focus. I am constantly followed, my phone taped, threatened, harassed ...but if I'm just going about my normal life..it make for some pretty uninteresting reporting:) And my ex wastes money and his time/energy - making him look like a nut. Eventually, he will get bored, find another victim and the idea of being super dad will lose its shine. In the mean time, I'm getting stronger emotionally.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing what these sick twisted (men) do all in the 'best interest of their children' to protect their children from 'evil' moms.... Makes me want to vomit....
ReplyDeleteI am inspired by the hope and strength you have....... sometimes I have it too....
Thank you. Faith and hope is all I got left. My abuser can not take that away unless I let him. I choose not to give him that power any more
ReplyDeleteLaura, you have more than faith and hope. You have the unconditional love for your girls - something that I'm sure your ex doesn't posess. Hold on to that love, it will be your strength in the darkest hours! You have already taken the power away from your abuser by speaking out. Trust me, the things he has done to you he will do to his new wife/partner. Men like this repeat the pattern of abuse over and over again. Be thankful that you are out of his game and are seeing things clearer and not through the eyes of a victim any longer. You will be reunited with your girls, time changes a lot of things that none of us can ever predict. My prayers are with you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for such kind loving words. I hope you are right. I have missed out on so much of their life and OUR system doesn't seem to care unless money is involved. It is very sad. I hope one day, my girls can forgive me for not being able to protect them
ReplyDeleteLaura, my heart and prayers are with you. You are a mother and no one can replace that! Your girls will always love their mom no matter what is said or done. Your love is unconditional as is theirs. I'm giving you a big hug , things will get better!
ReplyDeleteThank you as that means a lot. It has been a VERY difficult 10years. However, I believe in Karma. I am just trying to keep the faith right now which is challenged
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